In the British parliament, as Eddie Izzard has observed, the most entertaining it might get is honourable friends waving their papers, shouting 'Toilet paper! Toilet paper! Toilet paper in our times!", but the Italians have much more fun. I stumbled across this 'in pictures' story on the Guardian the other day and felt a bit like Bill Bryson reading about Australian politicians drowning in mysterious circumstances; why don't we hear more about this?

The background is the passing of a vote of no confidence in Romano Prodi, but that's not the fun bit. No, that comes from reading the captions and looking at the pictures. During this sitting, we learn of one politician who was called a lump of shit and a cuckold before bursting into tears and collapsing, see politicians throwing water all over the chamber, and – the crowning glory, this – stuffing mortadella in their mouths as an act of political satire.

Click here to see all the pics.

In describing the appeal of the antics of the sealions at San Francisco's Pier 39 today, Alex suggested that they were like a cross between dogs and penguins – with all the charm that that implies – and frankly I think that's such a good way of putting it that from now on I shall be claiming that description for myself. Sorry, old chap.

* Please excuse the language; old MacUser staffers may recognise it as a Penfold saying. With the possible exception of Penfold himself, as I may have just imagined this episode.

Just signed up for MacHeist II – a great bundle of Mac shareware worth almost $500, yours for only $49. There's some phenomenal stuff in there, but for me this year it was all about Wingnuts 2 – a hugely fun top-down shoot-em-up that looks utterly gorgeous. It's downloading now, and I suspect I'll be late in my bed tonight as a result. You can get more info about the bundle at the link below – and if you're clever enough to buy it through that link, I get licences for another couple of apps. Be quick, though; the whole promotion only runs for another three days.

https://www.macheist.com/buy/invite/96433

San Francisco is proving much more enjoyable this year than on past trips; partly it's just that I have more time – a clear two and a half days before work proper starts – partly it's because Mrs P is here and I feel more up for doing touristy things, and partly it's because I've been here sufficiently frequently now that I have a decent idea of the geography of the place and of where's fun. Photographic shennanigans follow.

3am – 5:30am: Dinner with Apple

I fucking hate time zones.

I don't have the ability to write anything more; go and read the wife's blog instead.

Also, it was Dave's last day today. *Sniff* Bye, Dave and Mendy. *Sniff*

And not a sex-drugs-and-rock-and-roll teenager at that. Oh no; something much less palatable.

Further wallowing in Old Technology Nostaligia™ the other day, I bought on eBay the 100th issue of PCW Plus magazine. It was the first magazine I read with any regularity, and it helped me with my first computer, an Amstrad PcW 10. Plus, it's an old Future mag, so there was a second connection.

Turns out there's a third: in this issue not only had I written a letter that had been published, but I'd also submitted a design to the magazine's inaugural Readers' Gallery and won a £5 voucher for, um, the application I'd used to design the thing. The fact that the design is one for the cover of my Standard Grade Physics folder perhaps tells you everything you need to know about Teenage Chris.



Or maybe that doesn't paint a clear enough picture for you of a 14 year-old me. In which case, I present Exhibit B: my letter that appears just above my masterpiece.



"Insufferable little shit" just about covers it, don't you think?

Mrs Phin, bless her, will tell you herself that she's not one of nature's nursemaids. I, on the other hand, quite like taking care of poorly wives. The differences in our approach to spouse-care were highlighted last night when, as Jenny pointed out, her stellar performance over the duration of my first cold of 2008 largely consisted of:

A allowing me to watch as much Top Gear as I liked
B not shouting at me when I blew my nose
C merely gritting her teeth and taking a deep breath when I sneezed

I basked in this unprecedentedly luxurious standard of care.

She would no doubt appreciate it if I pointed out that she thinks my nose-blowing and sneezing are louder than the average. The average pachyderm, possibly. But then again, she smells of wee, so it's all swings and roundabouts, really.